We declare to you what we have seen and heard so that you may have fellowship with us, and truly our fellowship is with Abba-God and Jesus Christ, the Son of God. This is the message we have heard from Christ and proclaim to you, that God is light and in God there is no darkness at all." 1 John 1: 3-5
I have been feeling the weight of the darkness lately. The physical darkness of shortened, cloudy days, and the spiritual and emotional heaviness that coincides with the waning daylight.
While this pressing darkness is annoying to me, I consider myself fortunate that for me the weight is like an extra 10 pounds in by backpack and not like the crushing boulder of Seasonal Affective Disorder. Those I've know who struggle with this form of depression have often felt themselves at odds with the pending holiday season, outside the circle of festivity. The shadows are too long, and the crevasses too deep.
I know the helplessness of not being able to "fix" my friends and loved ones and the agony of watching them as they suffer (often in silence). I have developed the practice of holding them in prayer, imagining, as I do so, that I am holding them in the light of God's love. The practice has been good therapy for me. Instead of denying, dreading, or damning the darkness creeping up on me, I pray for light for others. And sometimes, by God's grace, my own load begins to lighten a little.